I recently watched one of my favorite television shows, and there was a quote that stuck with me:
“Sometimes the only way to move forward is to revisit the things in your past that were holding you back. You have to deal with them head on, no matter how scary they may be. Because once you do, you’ll see that you can go further than you can imagine.”
-Barry Allen, The Flash
And sometimes all it takes are baby steps and some help.
Miguel, my boyfriend, took me to visit a hidden gem near Downtown San Diego. Called the Spruce Street suspension bridge, it was located in the urban jungle that was surrounded by beautiful homes and nature. There was even a trail underneath that I will try out sometime soon. The problem was is that have a perpetual fear of heights. This fear, although quite normal, can prove to be a detrimental one as I do want to explore some of the world’s more higher-up places. However, the thought of being on such a bridge high above ground terrified me still. I also happened to bring two dogs along that get extremely excited when visiting new places. So, you can imagine all the endless tugging and pulling alongside yelps of joy with a side of internal crying.
As soon as I set one foot on that bridge, I froze.
I couldn’t move.
I stood there like a statue for what seemed like a couple of minutes
contemplating all the ways I would die while planning my will. My palms began to sweat furiously (this hasn’t happened in a while, by the way), and I was on the verge to a nervous breakdown. What made it worse were the teenagers who constantly rocked the bridge back and forth, making me feel sick to my stomach. My boyfriend, who isn’t scared of heights, helped me boost my morale and guided me halfway until I sat down to admire the view as I dangled my feet in the darkness. To this day, I’m still unsure why I did that, but I’m glad I did.
And I used flash, too. Yikes.
While I didn’t cross over completely, making it halfway was still an accomplishment because I had the courage to do something I tried to avoid most of my life. Even as I’m writing this, I can’t help but be proud of myself. I didn’t want to miss out on something amazing because I chose to stay away. Rather, I believe life should be lived to the fullest each day and that goes for trying or facing something you’re afraid of. Not only did it give me this incredible feeling of accomplishment, it also gave me a sense of peace knowing that its been dealt with partially.
I admit, I still am terrified of heights, but at least I’m starting to overcome it.
Next time, I’ll walk 3/4ths.
What fears have you overcome? Leave your comments below – I’d love to hear your stories!